My heart is so tender right now and I've had such a time of self-reflection over the last few days. Being vulnerable is very uncomfortable. It can be scary because by baring my soul, it may open me up to circumspect. It could cast doubts on my character. It could cause someone to question my walk. But I know that if I don't look deep into myself and view me as God views me, that I will never truly grow. I don't want to stay the same in my Christian life. I want to go deeper and wider with Christ. But that stretching... that pulling at my guts... that growth spurt... It hurts...
Most of my pain has been as a result of major conviction from one sentence in Church on Sunday...
There should be no secrets in a marriage
Doesn't sound threatening... doesn't really seem to be scary at all when you speak it... but was. it. ever! the earthquake of emotion that I didn't see coming. A simple statement, but sometimes the most simplest of statement are the most convicting and life-changing. I have had a little bit of yuck in my past. And there is a limitation of opening up about the yuck that lies under the surface. I'm not needing confession therapy here, but I do have a few secrets in my past. Things that weren't beneficial to talk about. They wouldn't benefit anyone so I kept them to myself... But now I know that going deeper into where my heart is means digging out the yucky parts.
And that statement...
There should be no secrets in a marriage.
It shook me a little to say the least. I don't want to go into detail and maybe one day I will, but right now I'm too tender. I'll just say that we should always be thankful for our spouses. We should always treat them with the respect and honor due them. We shouldn't take them for granted because it could be so easy to lose them. Someone else could come in and steal them away without either one of you realizing it. It could happen so easily...
Breathe...
Pray...
Praise...
Be Thankful...
I am so in love with my husband and just want to shout it to the whole world. I want to encourage you to do the same with your spouse.
Love him... Laugh with him... spend time with him... have fun with him...invest in him... encourage him... dote on him... seduce him... woo him... praise him... cherish him... allow him to lead you... submit to him... don't ever give up on him... tell him how much he means to you and how thankful you are for him.
Only you can do that... that honor and privilege is yours to give... Don't waste the opportunity to share your life with him. Don't just live with him... abide in him... hold him close and never let him go...
Hearing things about ourselves that seem hurtful at the time can really be a good thing if we turn that pain into a self-reflection and learn from it and grow into a better, deeper person. Someone who will encourage those around them and build them up and become the person that we are created to be. But only if we dig a little deeper and unearth some of the yuck and face things about ourselves that aren't pleasant... Then we can truly be free...
I love you, Dana, and I'm thankful for the little reminder that you are my best friend... I look forward to a lifetime of tomorrow's with you.
Love,
your wife...
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